Depressive Manic

Manic depressive, I swing to the left

then back to the right –

I’m a swinger

But in either state I come up with great zingers!

Sometimes I like sharing songs

But then wonder if you’ll take it wrong

Most of the time my moods

do not interfere with who

I am –

a cool dude.

Among the coolest.

Possibly cooler than you!

 

HER PT. 4 (THE FINAL CHAPTER)

I met her and spoke no words to upset her

Thought thoughts in which I undress her

Perhaps she has grown to despise me

I type with complete trust

knowing she could probably pulverize me.

My gratitude is real, if I could express it in a hug

I would do so.

Please do not hurt me

Allow me to live in my mundo.

I am not attracted anymore

to the girl at that store.

But if you want you can accompany me

and I will ask her out in front of you

and then we will see…

 

Absorption, by now you know

I tend to blow details (lol)

out of proportion.

The girl at that store, attraction based solely

on superficiality…because in all actuality

I’m tired of masturbating.

I’ve done it so much, the record

I must have shattered it.

But to me you are worth more than

temporary relief.

How can I make you believe?

Love is a strong word

I wonder if I should use it

Would it be yet another instance of making myself look foolish?

 

Again, thank you for not harming Jose

And I’m sorry if he could not save the day

 

 

 

 

The Saga Continues

Rejection, it is hard to accept it, but I must because people have the right to not date me

People don’t recall my name, well, that’s a shame

I used to have game, but now? I make myself wonder…

Blunders, there are more to come, of that I’m certain

Never worry, I will never close my own curtain

There’s nothing appealing about a guy who’s shady and acts like a baby

i.e. a shady baby

I vowed to myself not to look at particular profiles

Because…it makes my mind run wild(er)

 

With that said,

 

I am going to ask out the girl at Sam’s Club. The way she greeted me was so nice, she must be into me.

However, I will try not to give it much thought. If she says no I will just go and ask out the cashier at Costco.

I am also liking the girl at Subway, she gives me free chips from time to time meaning she MUST find me intruiging.

This one is more of a long shot, but still, I am going to ask out that older woman at Sears.

Meanwhile, I will continue to write my novel, which someday might make me memorable. Then the girl at the kratom store will recall my name – assuming she’s into literature!

Life How I See It Right Now

I am lost like humanity; similar to humanity

I am lost.

Opinions chime dictatorial since time

immemorial.

Here I am hanging on, assuming I’ll contradict current conditions soon

I am sustaining myself, providing means to maintain my own mental health

This soul’s situation is dire like the ones of most Americans you hear about

Basically: existential crisis meets financial crisis – the problem thus encapsulated

Humanity is lost like Jose; similar to Jose

humanity is lost.

Politicians squirm professorial since time immemorial

A violent revolution, I long to see it happen

Organizing mass action, it is difficult to do

Marching is a waste, just another stage for soul-sucking

phones to participate in photo ops

Akin to the Bible, I don’t have all the answers, if any

I am just a guy in a maze constructed by strangers

This maze, to navigate is no issue of the category trivial

Critical steps, each one, sometimes it’s best you don’t take one

Myself, I am a stranger though I have met a lot of people

Kept in touch with very few,

so now my social network’s feeble.

….

Of the human species I’ma member, a creature brought about by the hand of evolution

I see my circumstances and yes, if I had a loving God, I would ask for absolution

Faced with a life of mediocrity, I wonder if another decade’s gonna change that

My brother is suffering the same and I lament that I can’t change that

So, what can I do?

I’m smoking Newports like I’m Jesus taking no thought for tomorrow

Pensamientos

She was a rainbow in an otherwise grim diary

I was lunacy to her,

lunacy to her stability. Her disposition battled mine.

Last love of the real kind – I felt it dissipate at 16.

Even then I doubted that I’d ever feel that way again.

I embody desperation, the feeling stemming from…

fulfillment lacking.

I’m too scared to choose

for certain a new avenue.

Can this “profession” be my passion if I approach with hesitation?

“Will it make me money?” – always it’s a prime consideration.

I am occupying this position – that I know for certain

I want to occupy a better one – that is generally my purpose

What does “better” mean? That is what I strive to figure out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Existencia

Pulling a rabbit out of a hat to fight a bat out of hell

Standing empty-handed nakedly at a show & tell

Some of my relatives are much more suicidal than the masses

If I wore glasses, I’d take them off to see something else

The smartphone, many were murdered glued to their tomb

I glance at my phone and wonder why I fancy myself immune.

I am GOD’s idea of AI, receive inputs, give outputs – reduce me to a chemical

Walk up on the scene and put the “non” into the sensical.