Depressive Manic

Manic depressive, I swing to the left

then back to the right –

I’m a swinger

But in either state I come up with great zingers!

Sometimes I like sharing songs

But then wonder if you’ll take it wrong

Most of the time my moods

do not interfere with who

I am –

a cool dude.

Among the coolest.

Possibly cooler than you!

 

A Rumination

The imagination, it’s a hell of a thing

I pitch without a hitch

and sell myself the dream.

Ease is with what I produce a path to letdowns

Let down but it is my fault ultimately

Self-swindled without a flame to be rekindled

This is either all too complex or pathetically simple.

Keep fantasies in the medicine cabinet

Medicine in my gut at all times

Like the mind, I can’t see physically my wants

Disoriented thoughts, yes those –

race and run the gauntlet.

I’m like winter mixed with spring

I like my fruit forbidden

I’m like nothing mixed with something

Stranded, harping hard on how it was to once be driven.

Some would say I’m “tripping”

I am tripping, truly

I was riffing – cruelly

Some would say I’m “tripping”

Me? I have no comment

Precisely, I could not state my intentions.

Loosely, there’s a chance I can speak sharply on my actions.

This is life and opportunities are passing me

They pass me with no waving, I look on like I’m forsaken.

But pity from the self, it has yet to help me

I have optimism somewhere

It’s tough to see

You see, it’s stealthy.

Indeed, someone will always have it worse than you, worse than I

Yet that knowledge is no killer and our hurt survives

What can I do? But spin a new narrative, try a new thing

Hope my next dream is no illusion,

and if I’m wrong – try again

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yoo-hoo

Sipping on a Yoo-hoo

Wondering if this woman really is wondrous

Or if she is a Plain Jane fitting in.

Social pressure molds perception but I’m singled out as sole manipulator

 

Sipping on an ice-cold Mountain Dew and I had to eat the soda tax

The can’s moist green texture is appealing to the eye

Shoot this nuisance in the head and that’s the end of that

I knew a couple of people who fought fair and that’s what justified their deaths

 

Sipping on a Monster, the original

Chainsmoking like Beethoven

Stand back and admire the absurdity of what we’ve woven

I am a book that’s open, you are a notebook that had to be opened

The world is coming to a close, won’t you hold my hand?, I’ll hold you closer than my values

 

Sipping on Nestle coffee put together in an instant

Mentally I feel as though we are not too distant

Take the hits I’m giving thee and strike me down with karma

Are you alone? Company only sticks around for a short while

 

Sipping on her pussy juice 

In a thermos is liquid sex and ecstasy

Steam rises out of it when I tilt it back and drown in it

It changed my whole perspective

Headed back to campus

I call it the Resurrection

 

 

Tropicana 

Sipping Tropicana

Sitting on my hands trying not to open up another can of….

WORMS

Sipping on a mango Arizona

With a bag of kratom on my side

I’m trying to survive although I do not know for what reason I wish to stay alive

Sipping on an A&W cream soda

It is flat like my affect but it tastes good despite that

I am perverted with my thinking yet as sweet as what I’m drinking

Now ME sipping on coconut water

Thinking about how life would be if that fun kid was my daughter

Would she be a blessing or a bother?

Or can a blessing be a bother?

Sipping Tropicana…

Sky, Inspire Me

Lasso around a cloud

makes a balloon – and string

held by an animal

 

Over the shoulder carry

a dream found, captured.

My dream is not a slave.

 

Parading around town.

Navy blue sports jacket

Jeans the color of bats

 

Bare feet connect my dream

to concrete plan, concrete.

I’m just the medium.

 

Now, once upon a night

I thought ambitious thoughts.

I went to the garage

and found what I had sought

 

I spun it over head –

spun like propellers, fast.

Blue bike popped a wheelie,

caught meaning as it passed

 

Nights long, fasting – feasting

on quick ruminations,

the things that make blueprints.

Write while weight is erasing

 

Drift ever so lightly, heels scrape the ground

Carried by my comrades – I love you guys

Rising. Rising.  I weigh nearly no pounds

Take off for good with propulsion of sigh

 

My dreams, you see…are attached to me

My neck is where they latched on to…breath (?)

Artful Little Aardvark

The aardvark smiles when the clock strikes 12

A plan centers around you and locks you

inside a station circular – the circle is the station

 

 

Banging a nail through a wall with forehead’s force

Washing hands with just water

Whimpering in a corner like a scared little boy

 

 

Shuffling along, passing scenes chaotic

Diving into garbage, hope no one sees me

Finding trash, think it treasure – easy

 

Standing in awe at an art museum

Portrait hangs over me with exaggerated enormity

Blown back for staring too long

 

Travel back to when all was still

No time to kill

I am real

 

 

Demoralized

I consist

of consciousness – that’s it

A sorry life, excuses flow profusely

Despair dares to pursue me

Seeks me incessantly

Looks under the bed, in the closet

in the most secluded chambers of my mind, hiding silently

Found frequently, maimed more

Compelled to purchase pain in store

Takes me like the tide

Fingers clawing at the sand…